Post by ultimateultrasaurus on Jul 8, 2018 9:57:38 GMT -5
It's not always easy being a Death Metal villain. I might have been a bit harsh on those guys... for most of them it's just a job, they have wives to support, kids to feed. Some have good reasons to be a goon, others just rolled into it. These are the stories of ordinary people landing in an odd job.
From left to right (and obviously because of the evil henchmen code, their names were changed)
Gary just really wanted to hold a tasergun and when he heard that the Death Metal Empire was looking for goons, he jumped at the opportunity.
Jake always got picked on when he was little, but he went to the gym, buffed up and now he's back with a vengeance (little did he know he would still get picked on by the other goons, because he has a really squeaky voice.)
Jordan, well Jordan is just really really ugly and his wife made him join (she heard you had to wear a mask, and ever since he joined she makes him wear the mask all day.
Barry just wanted to be a unicorn, and because that's not really a job or a possibility, he decided to join DM, so now he at least has the idea he can pretend to be a unicorn.
Steve is actually the only one that realized they were taking a group photo.
Andre, really the biggest of the bunch, didn't have a job for two years when he heard DM were looking for goons. The pay is good, the dental care is awesome, he just thought win win situation (little did he know a small Pikachu tail donning boy would hit him in the face with rocks, taking out most of his teeth. And sadly DM lied to him... there is no dental plan..
Johnny actually thought this was the local LARP group, he liked the mask and thought his tasergun was a prop (in a moment he will shock himself in the face while checking his "prop gun"
Greg, well Greg is having serious second thoughts.. They said you just have to stand there and look intimidating. But secretly he's thinking about leaving and opening up an ice salon.
Bob always had this weird pink star-shaped birthmark and kids always called him Starlight, much to his dismay. When he saw the DM gang walking by, he immediately felt at home, finally people won't call him names anymore (in a few seconds he will get headbutted in the face by Arashi though)
Jerry really doesn't know fiction from reality, he always thought he had delusions about fighting large mechanized animals and dinosaurs, so he thinks it's not real. Everyone just let's him do his thing (and weirdly enough he's really good at baking cakes, so they like him either way.)
Sammy is thinking (when looking at his fellow DM goonie) "Wow, you're really short for a Death Metal goon."
Billy just needed the distraction. His wife is pregnant with her 6th kid and it was either sign up for DM or do Lamaze training..again..(the Lamaze trainer hates Billy, so he's happy to be out of the house.
And finally Pete, indeed the smallest of the bunch, but he's just biding his time and is secretly planning to steal Death Rex later on and starting a petting zoo with Zoids (he will however get sued, because Rex will eat most of the park visitors)
Oh and the Raptor riders (a triplet; Larry, Moe and Curly (their dad was apparently a Stooges fan) and their buddy Alex just really really wanted a pony since they were little. Dad saved up for a pony but ran off with the money to become a circusclown (ironic really). So the triplets and their friend finally got their ponies, well Raptor Zoids, but those are even better than a pony right?
