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Post by devildog113 on Aug 15, 2006 0:06:53 GMT -5
And yes I know about the cliches in the story line, Which I was told by the people who helped me with this story were unavoidable! And if you want to help me at all with the editing of the story I will be glad to email you the other parts as soon as they are completed just send me a message or email me at endokatana@hotmail.com.
I promise the second part will be up soon.
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Post by KAndrw on Aug 15, 2006 0:32:11 GMT -5
Cliches can be fun! And the SOLE reason to write fanfic is to have fun. If part of the fun you're aiming for is to bask in other people's praise, you need to balance writing what you like with writing what people will enjoy.
Few people enjoy fighting with language to understand it, so grammar checking is important if you want to be as well-received as possible.
You might have more luck writing shorter, self-contained stories. By necessity they force you to be concise and easy to understand. Setting up a huge story arc takes a lot of work, and its hard to prevent the early stuff from being boring.
What you have here is not a BAD start. Don't be too disillusioned. But also don't discount what people have told you. Your story did not captivate them, and they have told you why. Some of them have been more cutting than others *coughorangecough*, but they're all worth listening to.
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Post by Deadborder on Aug 15, 2006 7:39:20 GMT -5
Dude I'm 17 and the only reason I didn't say sex is because my female doesn't know what it is called on earth! Hang on... she can construct a perfectly rational sentance, use lenghty words that would be specific to Earth mythology and language and describe the coming situation but she doesn't know the word for "sex"? Come on... that's more then just a bit hard to swallow. Well, here's the thing. I am saying if I liked it or not. And, in this case, I am telling you why I didn't like it. And no, I did not enjoy the story, but agin I am telling you why I didn't like it. Now, rather then shouting at me (and with multiple exclamation points to boot) you can read over my comments (And those of the others here) and go "hmm, they didn't like this fic, and they said why they didn't." Then you can take those comments under your hat and work with them and improve your fic. Rick R. PS: "I'm 17" doens't cut it with me. I've seen some grwat fics by 17-year-olds.
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Post by Tilly on Aug 15, 2006 7:52:39 GMT -5
When I write I'd consider it more insulting to get "it's great!" when someone didn't think as much than to have them point out what they thought was a major issue. Personal attacks are another matter, and certain people should keep that in mind. *coughs the same as KAndrw*
Being willing to edit and work with stuff is a good thing, though. The more you do it the faster your writing will improve...I know I cringe at stuff of mine that's only a few years old now.
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Post by devildog113 on Aug 15, 2006 14:40:22 GMT -5
Sorry I snapped at you Deadborder. I know the grammar in the first one wasn't good and like I said before I am writing a novel and thought I would just do these for fun and slack off, but I can see grammar is important and will work on it. And by the way if any body is interested in proof reading part 2 please send me a message or email me at endokatana@hotmail.com.
P.S. I'm sorry for snapping and I apologize for it. I promise part 2 will be better. And to clear things up my female character Kass doesn't know what it's called on earth so she calls it "interacting".
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Post by devildog113 on Sept 2, 2006 0:02:04 GMT -5
Sorry It's taking so long for Part 2 to come out. But currently I've got many other things that I'm working on (other fanfics/Short storys, School, Wrestling, JROTC, and my relationships) . So I promise when I get the chance to upload part 2 I will. I feel that you will enjoy the other parts, and I hope that whoever reads this has enjoyed it to some degree and hopefully understands what I wrote it for.
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Post by devildog113 on Sept 6, 2006 16:52:19 GMT -5
Okay so I may be posting again in this. What I want to know is if anybody would mind me taking the first part and editing the grammer and some of the story. Because I just reread it, and I think I can do a lot better if I edited it.
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Post by Tilly on Sept 6, 2006 20:12:14 GMT -5
You can't go wrong with editing! And even if you do...well, that's why I keep older copies of stuff I write for backup.
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Post by rantinan on Sept 7, 2006 4:02:24 GMT -5
Dude, please for the love of god and all that is holy, edit the first part. it needs it, as you have noticed.
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